The Empty Nest Mom

When I didn’t know where to channel my anger or how to get rid of an overwhelming sense of betrayal, I focused on getting my degree.

It was something I should have finished nine years and three children before everything fell apart.

“We’ll make it through,” he said.

“Yes, we’ll make it through,” I responded.

“You did this, but we’ll make it through.”

What choice did I have?

That’s what a SAHM who quit her schooling with the first pregnancy and stayed home had left herself with.

No Plan B.

Instead of stewing, I opted for growth.

It took me five years to get my Bachelor’s Degree. In between school lunches, violin lessons, T-ball and helping my three little ones with homework, I wrote my term papers and learned about tectonic plates. I brushed up on Algebra and marveled at the rings of Saturn through a telescope.  I read Chaucer and Shakespeare and still today, twenty years later, appreciate every trip to an art museum more completely because of the Art History classes I took.

Baby #4 was born mid-semester in my junior year. I carried him in a front sling with a backpack of books hefted on my shoulder. I’d nurse him in bathroom stalls on campus in between classes while nibbling on a sandwich myself.

I knew, somewhere between the professors who encouraged, the other students who became friends and the sheer joy of learning again, that I’d come into my own strength. I knew I’d make it to graduation this time.

In the end, that marriage didn’t survive.

But I did.

So on my graduation day, at the ripe old age of 32, I looked up and saw my two daughters beaming and waving from the stands above, and hoped they had picked up a few things about the value of education too.

At any age the years will pass whether we take advantage of them or not.

I was worried at 27 that I’d be 32 before I’d graduate. I thought then, that 32 was old.

Now I’m 55.

At 32 I was a very young woman.

So what if you’re 50? What’s to stop you at 60?

Five years from now you’ll be five years older no matter where you stand right now.

Whatever it is you want to do, you can do it.

Earning my diploma taught me it’s wise to focus on growth and expansion.

It’s healthy to stay curious.

Graduate over and over.

Step outside your comfort zone.

Pursue that dream.

Dare.

Learn.

Work hard.

Focus on all the magic that is in our world, our universe, the arts, science, and lessons passed down through history.

Plan for many graduation days in your life.

You’ll take away so much more wonder and wisdom than what’s printed on that diploma.